We were three strangers that eventually came together by marrying into the same family. Kim, Jenny and I became family through marriage. Jenny had pointed out that we were more than just in-laws; we had a bond when it came to understanding and navigating our new extended family and with a wink and a nod between ourselves became the out-laws. That connection spanned many holidays together and growing children over the years. We were just doing life and grateful for the days of experiencing the invaluable gift of an extended family.
But now there are days that it’s hard to believe Kim is gone. There are days that I struggle with the evil, insidious monster that cancer is. Philosophically, I argue to God the seeming injustice and lack of empathy the way this senselessly ended; I mean, if it’s a death sentence then let’s end it. Be done. What is the purpose to allow the stricken to go through a final phase of extreme discomfort and emotional anguish when the inevitable is in sight? And then, of course, my mind wonders why in the name of heaven would a mother who's love for her five kids was way above question; a music teacher for most of her life; a God-fearing, charitable and loving soul; and a country-living farmer’s wife be struck down before the age of sixty.
So what about it? We could say that our loss is heaven’s gain. We could say that we all have our number of days on this earth. We could remind ourselves that God works in mysterious ways. But the truth is, we’re trying to impossibly understand what the Creator of both the universe and our finely-tuned bodies has in mind. And since we don’t operate on God’s level, our ability to comprehend His will (outside of the essentials of the faith) will remain limited.
Specifically, what if our definitions of certain human characteristics like healing, fairness, charity, strength, effectiveness, success, etc. were developed by well-intentioned generations of the past but were not aligned with God Almighty? Aside from prayer, I don’t know how one would know the will of the Father, but it seems more often than not we are not on the same page. For instance, something like living to a full age and checking off the boxes to whatever success looks like would mean more to us than our Heavenly Father. And even though sin is sin to God, the concept of bad guys and evil being more prolific than persons walking in their faith would be more objectionable to us. Even our viewpoint of living an effective life would have more significance to us than in the bigger plan of creation. The point is each person has been given talents and abilities uniquely yours by God; our mission, our assignment is to use those in such a way as to bring Him honor and glory. As Kim begins her first ten-thousand years in heaven, I’m sure she will understand what that plan did for those whose paths she crossed and the legacy of the impact of her Christian worldview.
So, it’s important not to lose sight of the mission we were created for in the first place. Perhaps, the life on this earth is less important on how long we live and what we think we should be doing, and more important on using our gifts and time for God’s glory. It occurs to me despite the evil in this world that lives to see another day, while career criminals, child sex traffickers, drug dealers to kids, etc. still pervert the sanctity of life, my sister-in-law Kimberly’s vibrant passion and joyful laughter has been silenced. However, since we have no understanding of our Creator’s reason for our individual journeys, it seems likely that each of our stories will end up being different from what we planned. And whether it spans many years, is full of excitement, is devoted to loving others, is low-key, or short lived; every human on earth will have to give an account of what you did with the life you were given and what did you do with Jesus your Lord and Savior.
Well done my sister outlaw, you left a great legacy; we’ll take it from here. Peace.
Three-minute exposure; a snapshot of life’s imperfect harmony,” by Stew McAuley.
Encouraging your Christian Worldview
